Yet another homemade Christmas gift. I had a ton of Dead Sea salt which someone gave me. They literally ordered almost a ton of the stuff, so I took it happily. Now it was time to think of something to do with it. I love salt scrubs because you get benefit of exfoliation and the moisturizing from the oil. Plus you smell awesome. So I decided to do a salt scrub, make the ‘smell combo’ (technical term), put in little fun jars & include the cute little spoons (because who doesn’t like miniature bamboo spoons.)

What you need for the entire project

• computer + software (I use Illustrator) + printer
• jar - I used a these Jarden widemouth jars
• Dead Sea salt – fine grain works best, but I only had a larger grain & it worked, but not as well as fine grain
• essential oils – choose your favorites – I like these Pure Therapeutic Grade Basic Sampler Essential
• Almond, Jojoba, Grapeseed or Massage Oil – I used Grapeseed oil and found a deal at Costco
• card stock
• ribbon
• labels to fit your jars – I used these Avery labels
• bamboo mini spoons – I used these spoons

Salt Scrub

I made 12 jars at once, so I mixed 6 cups of Dead Sea salt and 3 cups of oil together in a large bowl, filled the jars and then added the essential oils (about 5 drops) to each individual jar  so the smells did not mix. I mixed each jar with a toothpick and then tossed the toothpick. But here is the recipe for just 1 cup.

• 1 cup Dead Sea salt, fine grain
• 1/2 cup Almond, Jojoba, Grapeseed or Massage Oil
• Approximately 5 – 7 drops essential oils

Have fun and mix the oils… I made peppermint orange or eucalyptus mint.

Everything Else

This isn’t an illustrator or design tutorial, but I think personal labels are fun and make it look more professional and special. My labels say ‘Al’s Salt Scrub,’ the name of the smell-rific scent, instructions. Instructions just said: massage over dry areas in shower.

I also made snarky gift tags for all my homemade projects. Why? Because I love sarcasm and those little personal touches. They are just ‘To’ – ‘From’ gift tags, but they have fun little sayings. Some of them are:

Assembly

Take your full jars, slap the salt scrub sticker on the top, cut the ribbon, put the gift tag on the ribbon, wrap the ribbon around and twist the mini bamboo spoon once or twice with the ribbon & tie in a bow. It’s easy.

You can crank out a bunch of these babies and once you have the jars all done, refilling them is easy. Reuse! Reuse! Reuse!

I always find it difficult to craft gifts for men. I can think of projects all day long for my sister, mom and friends. But when it comes to the men, I think…hmmmm…can I upcycle a wrench? This year, I took something that everyone close to me loves–music–and searched for an idea.

My dad loves music and is the one who taught my sister and I to love it too. For example this year, I called him for help on my car and he said, “bring it out and I’ll take a look” and then “oh, and I have Skynard/ZZ Top tickets for tonight. Want to go?” So, I thought, ‘what can I do with a record or music?’

I found a tutorial online and followed it for an easy, fun and meaningful gift. Did I mention it’s easy…I mean really, really easy. Seriously, this is pretty much the easiest crafting ever. And you can customize it to each recipient. For example, my dad got the Skynard ablum.

The hardest part of this is picking out the right album or artist for it. There is a delicate balance (or at least in my head). I think the balance is this: choose the right artist for the right person, but DON’T choose an album that they don’t already have or that is difficult to find. I would feel terrible if I ruined an album that would be better spinning around, pumping out great music.

What you need:

1. Vinyl record
2. Tall coffee mug (I use a glass Irish coffee mug like this one)
3. Oven

So, here’s the easy, easy directions (here are the original directions with pics):

1. Find the album (see above–because you’re never listening to it again)
2. Preheat the oven to 200 degrees & put rack in middle of oven
3. Put the tall coffee mug upside down in the middle of the oven. Place the record on top of mug (make sure the mug is only touching the paper part of the album.)
4. Watch it closely! It will only take a few minutes (2-3) for it to start softening. When it gets soft enough, take it out.
5. *Immediately start molding into the shape you want. You need to do this in about 10-15 seconds because then it starts getting hard.
6. Now let it cool.  If you don’t like the way it looks. You can put it back in for 10-30 seconds and remold.
7. You’re DONE!

*Be careful not to burn yourself. If you don’t have ‘chef hands’ then maybe gloves would help.

I found this really great tutorial before Christmas and decided to make a bunch of funky felt flowers as gifts to family and friends. I will totally admit that Megan Reardon’s flowers are way better than mine and that her photos are amazing. I failed to take actual photos, instead logging the process and result with my iPhone.

Find the tutorial here.

I made 8 funky felt flower pins at a time, which meant hundreds of squares being cut out, then shaping them into leaves, then rolling and gluing them individually. This is not for the faint of heart OR for people who don’t have some serious hand muscles.

Changes made to the tutorial:

1. I found it difficult to keep the glued petals together, so I glued them and then stuck pins (see photo) in them to secure them while they were drying.
2. I liked the look of the entire flower being petals (see red flower photo) instead of there being a middle piece (see purple flower), so I just kept adding more and more petals.

Also, I’d seen some flower and feather pins, so I made pin backs and just cut out shapes or glued on feathers. The center of the feather pins is just a button I found at JoAnn Fabrics. The sewn felt pin in pink and grey (see pic) was inspired by something I saw on Pinterest.

More Christmas crafty projects to come. I was a busy little elf this year.

I may be going off on a tangent, but when people say “that cake is so cute” and then they bite into it and it tastes like a rubber encrusted ashtray…then what? Where is the pride in the craft? So, if you want to use all the pre-made stuff (and make Duff rich), then more power to you, but you’ll be missing the part where they say, “Oh my god, it’s so tasty.” So just take a moment and think about it and then spend 8 hours laboring over a cake that will be eaten in 20 minutes. I swear, it doesn’t sound like it’s worth it–but it is.

My first fondant (go easy people)

my first fondant cake

This was done for my friend’s 30th birthday and it was my first attempt at fondant. I was just happy I didn’t drop the thing on the way in the bar.

Monkey Fondant Cake

Monkey Fondant Birthday Cake for my Nephew

Next up was a birthday cake for my nephew who loves monkeys and who we lovingly refer to as ‘monkey.’  I made this tutorial for the monkey cake.

60th Birthday Cake Complete with Dentures

60th Birthday Cake w/ Dentures

Me - NOT dropping the cake

I may have had a little too much fun with this cake. My mom was turning 60 and so I racked my brain to think of appropriate things to put on said cake. I decided I shouldn’t put anything appropriate on it. So the dentures are made of rice crispies covered in fondant. There are pill bottles and ’60′ on the top tier. The blue balls are an ‘artist’s interpretation’ of viagra pills. The bottom tier has AARP cards and wheelchair signs. I was running out of time on this one, so the decorations aren’t up to par, but you get the idea. The other pic is me NOT dropping the cake. Anyone who knows me, knows you need a picture of this because at any point I may fall on my face.

Yankees Baseball Fondant Cake w/ Yankees Logo & Baseball Cupcakes

I hate the yankees, but this cake is ok

#1 – I hate the Yankees. Really–I’m a Cubs fan. But I had to make the cake for a die-hard Yankees fan, so I left the city of Chicago to purchase a Yankees hat to base the design off of. And, yes, the Yankees baseball hat is now in the trash.

I layered 2 10-inch cakes & cut out the cake to form the main hat shape, then used a piece of lightweight cardboard for the bill. I also made about 4 dozen cupcakes. The cupcakes were carrot cupcakes w/ cream cheese frosting w/ hand cut Yankees logos from fondant and white cupcakes with vanilla buttercream icing and coconut piped w/ laces for baseballs. This picture is pretty bad, but I made sure to put the air holes, little nub at the top (don’t know the actual term) and stitching.

Toy Story Bed Fondant Cake

Finished Toy Story Bed Cake

Not Finished - Toy Story Bed Cake

Just the bed

My nephew now loves Toy Story and he was turning 3, so that worked well with the Toy Story 3 movie that had come out. Anyway, after much research I decided to make a bed. I made 2 9×13 cake pans and 2 9-inch (1 white of each and 1 chocolate of each.) I made the floor boards and headboard out of chocolate fondant. The headboard is corrugated cardboard cut out with an exactoknife  and covered in fondant. The floorboards were one sheet and then made indentations to make it look like wood. I also painted a little bronze shimmer on them to give depth.

I layered the cakes and coated them in buttercream. And created a pillow out of extra cake and fondant. I made the blue comforter and then took a sewing tool that you use to make impressions through tracing paper. It’s a wheel on a long handle (I have no clue what it’s called) to make the stitching on the quilt. Then I draped it over, and made sure to make some folds like a real comforter. I cut out the letters, then placed them on a dark blue fondant and cut out the background. Same with his name and #3. Finally I made a little carpet & placed the toys all around. I’m not crazy enough to make the toys on this one. At least not yet.

There are many more to come…I just have to make them.

Anyone have a birthday? Just kidding. You don’t have enough money, well maybe you do.

However, there are bikers that just give us a bad name. So I’ve decided that I need to give some lessons. No one is going to listen to me, but why would they start now? Please help a sista out. Add your ideas or comments.  I know I’ll keep updating this list.

So here we go… my How To Bike in the City of Chicago Rules:

1. We all know that no one (biker or car driver) does the 3 second stop at stop signs, but for Christ’s sake, please stop at the stop sign if there are others approaching the stop sign. First, not everyone sees you just because you’re on your over-priced bike. If there are cars or bikes coming then please STOP at the damn stop sign. And follow the rules. I blow stop signs too, but it’s because I know no one is coming. Now please don’t become a statistic. Surprise someone. Stop at a stop sign.
2. Stay on the RIGHT SIDE!!!! Don’t bike down the left side (yes, your left) because – guess what – you’re going to run into another biker trying to ride on the right side of the street with a stationary car on one side and a moving one on the other.This seems like commons sense, but apparently it isn’t.
3. There are these things called pedestrians. You know – bipeds. You might want to watch out for them.
4. When on the bike trail – say “on your left” to unexpecting bikers, walkers, bike renters (ugh), runners, (super annoying) rollerbladers, baby-jogger-doggie-walkers, elderly people, and anyone else. Because – guess what? They aren’t paying attention. Oh yeah – they don’t care about your obscure bicycle racing water resistant shirt w/ a pocket in the back. And also, there might be people coming in the opposite direction, so you might wanna look out for them too.
5. Stay in the bike lane. When there’s a bike lane, 1) thank your lucky stars, and 2) stay in the damn bike lane. It’s there for a reason.
6. SIGNAL. Yes – it’s true. No one knows the actual bike signs for left, right, stop etc.  But guess what? You have fingers. POINT! Just sayin.
7. DON’T RIDE ON THE SIDEWALK, unless you’re 12.  Enough said.
8. Wear a helmet. My daddy is an actual biker (the kind with motors) and I’ve seen way too many people leave their brains on the asphalt. So please wear a brain bucket. What’s the worst thing that can happen? Your brain lands in a nice bucket?
9. Don’t be an idiot. That car/truck is way, way, way bigger than you are. Have some common sense – don’t dart in and out of cars like you’re a member of the Fantastic Four or possibly The Incredibles.

Okay. So I’m not saying that drivers know what the hell they’re doing because God, Allah, the Buddha or hopefully someone knows that they sure as hell don’t, but I’m saying brothers and sisters unite and don’t make us all look like a bunch of assholes. Have some common sense & respect others.  Believe me, I’ll rant shortly about all the drivers that need to go back to driving school and to those people – all I have to say is I can do some creative things with my bike bell. Don’t challenge me.

Burlesque Fan Girl - Pattern from Sublime Stitching

Who doesn’t love pin up girls? I’m talking WW1 / WW2 beauties draped over an aircraft with perfectly curled hair and pristine makeup. Something about the photos, either the daring way they are shot or the shear amount of guts it must have taken to be in pictures like this, make me think these women were strong.  Every feminist bone in my body fights that sentiment, but I find a source of power in their boldness & I decided to celebrate this… in my bathroom.  The bathroom is where the ladies ended up (in embroidery, in frames – not in reality.)

The ‘fan girl’ was a pattern from Sublime Stitching out of her amazing book, Embroidered Effects. If you haven’t checked out her work, quirky patterns, and step-by-step instruction…it’s a must see.

The other two girls are from pictures of pin up girls I found and altered into a pattern.

They could definitely use some work, and aren’t anywhere close to perfect, but just like the buxom beauties that dared to bare it before photoshop and airbrushing — I love them just the same.

I made a pattern from some old pinups I found and improvised.

Burlesque Dancer in a Martini Glass - Based design off of an old pinup girl photo

humpty dumpty had a great fall

My mom is the queen of jean blankets. She’s been making them for baby showers since before I was born. In fact, I have my own baby jean blanket & my own graduated-from-college/wall-of-shame jean blanket.  The latter of the two, is a giant jean blanket chronicling my entire life with iron on pictures. (Thanks mom, but there were probably some photos she could’ve left out.)

She knows I like to embroider, so she asked me to participate in blanket for a friend of the family. I didn’t know what the theme of the baby’s room was going to be so I decided that nursery rhymes were a safe bet.  All these pics are before they were washed, so you can see some of my markings. Oops.

and the cow jumped over the moon

twinkle twinkle little star

I kinda messed up on the twinkle, twinkle square.  I thought that the nursery rhyme said, “how I wonder where you are.”  Which is why I tried hiding the star in the pocket.  So this one didn’t turn out like I wanted, but at least I caught the mistake before we sewed it into the blanket.

My mom sewed the blanket together and backed it with some soft fleece. And it all worked out in the end.

Final Monkey Fondant Cake

Part 1

My monkey cake template

I’m a fondant cake novice, so I decided my second fondant cake would be for my nephew’s 2nd birthday. If it turned out inedible and unidentifiable, then a 2 year old can’t really yell at me. Well, he could, but no one would understand him.

He loves monkeys and it was between a monkey cake and Ming-Ming cake from Wonderpets (“gooooo Wonderpets – yeah!”). Although Ming-Ming is adorable, the monkey won.  So I started by making a template out of paper and some of my cake rounds. Yes, I know there’s suppose to be more than one ear and more than one foot, but you’ll have to use your imagination.  Initially I was going to do the ears, arms, etc in rice krispy treats, but it ended up just being the banana, #2, and the feet.  Everything else was cake. I highly recommend making a template. If you’re a bit anal like me, then you’ll make sure to make every piece while also making sure the size looks right.

I was apparently doing this template while I was drinking because if you look at the picture it has a #1 and not a #2 in his little hand.  Thankfully, I didn’t make that mistake on the actual cake.

Part 2

Next, I made my fondant.  I love the recipe for Marshmallow Fondant from Peggy’s Baking Corner and I made 2 batches. 1 chocolate and 1 regular.  I love this recipe because it’s forgiving & easy. Instead of reinventing the wheel & making this blog 8 pages long, please check her recipe out.  Also, for the chocolate, I used the same recipe and added 1 ounce of melted chocolate to the warm marshmallows and 1 T of high quality cocoa into the powdered sugar and mix.

Part 3

Two days before the party I made the yellow cakes. And doubled the batch.  The recipe below has been doubled and made 3 – 9″ rounds, 1 – 6″ round, and a bread pan (I ran out of pans.)

Yellow Cake Recipe

Original recipe from Wilton.com

All of the yellow cakes for the monkey cake

Ingredients:

• 6 cups sifted cake flour
• 5 teaspoons baking powder
• 1 teaspoons salt
• 3.5 cups sugar
• 1 1/3 cup butter or margarine
• 4 eggs
• 3 teaspoons vanilla
• 2 1/2 cups milk

Makes: Cake serves 24.

instructions

Preheat oven to 350°F. Grease bottom of two 8-inch round cake pans and line with waxed paper or parchment paper. Sift together flour, baking powder and salt; set aside. Cream sugar and butter together until light. Add eggs and vanilla to creamed mixture and beat until thoroughly mixed. Add flour mixture to creamed mixture alternately with milk, beating well after each addition. Continue beating one minute. Spread batter evenly in prepared pans. Bake 30 to 35 minutes or until wooden pick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool layers in pans on wire racks 10 minutes. Remove from pans; cool completely. Fill and frost as desired.

Part 4

Now onto the buttercream. When I make buttercream, I don’t mess around – I make a huge recipe and freeze the remaining. Epicurious has a great recipe that makes more buttercream icing than you should possibly need. If you need more icing then you may have a serious problem or may end up in a diabetic coma.  I’ve only modified this recipe to meet my tastes.

1. Cream shortening and butter with an electric, handheld, or paddle-whip mixer. Add flavoring and salt. Gradually add sugar, one cup at a time. Add meringue powder. (The mixture will appear dry.)

2. Add liquid of choice and beat until light and fluffy (approximately 5 to 8 minutes). Keep the bowl covered with a damp cloth or plastic wrap.

Storage: Store the icing in an airtight container and freeze for up to 3 months.

Yield: 2 1/2 quarts (2.37 L)

Part 5

Monkey cake assembly

Now onto the assembly. I should’ve taken more pics of the assembly, but i was in the zone and totally spaced that portion. The body is 2 9″ rounds with buttercream and raspberry puree in between. Then I used my template and cut out his belly and rounded out the belly portion by shaving off cake. Next I placed the 6″ cake round at the top for the head.

Then I cut out the mouth portion from a 9″ round using my ‘mouth’ template U& placed it on top of the head. Since there are portions of the bottom of the oval that didn’t have support, I used the shavings from the ‘body’ to create support under the ‘mouth’ area.

Then I cut the ears out of the remaining of the 9″ round. Finally, I cut the arms out of the cake that was baked in my bread pan. It wasn’t pretty, but it worked. This monkey-in-progress was then put into the refrigerator.

Part 6

Naked monkey cake starting to get some fondant clothes

I figured, we didn’t want a naked monkey so I started with his base chocolate fondant ‘skin.’

The fondant was in the fridge for a couple days, so I put it in the microwave for 10 seconds, twice. Then I brought it out and kneaded it on my plastic roll mat using cornstarch so it won’t stick. I did end up adding a little water while kneading it. After rolling it to about 1/8″ I cut the body shape out, smoothed it over the body and then cut the overhang with a paring knife. The body, arm, ears and head were all covered.

After I was done with the body, I had some white cornstarch dots on the chocolate. So I took a pastry brush and a tiny bit of water to brush away the dots. It did a pretty good job.

Part 7

Rice krispy treats to the rescue

Rice krispy treats to the rescue.

I made some traditional marshmallow rice krispy treats but made them with a bit less rice krispies to make it more pliable.  I don’t use a recipe, I just eyeball it, so here’s my general idea of a recipe.

5 cups Rice Krispies

1 bag small marshmallows

2 T butter

In a large bowl put 2 T butter in the bottom of a large bowl. Melt in the microwave. Dump all marshmallows into the warm butter and stir. Put back into the microwave for 30 seconds, then stir. Continue until almost melted and smooth. Take it out and stir until completely smooth.  Add all the rice krispies. Line a 9″ x 13″ pan with parchment paper and press the treats down into the pan. Now let cool.

After they’re cool, cut out the shapes you need and then add some more treats to form the shapes. It’s not shown in the pic, but I also made two balls for the hands to make it more stable.

Part 8

Almost done

Geez… you’d think I’d be done by now.  This kid better like this cake.

Now onto the white parts. The mouth, belly, belly button, inside of ears, background to eyes, and middle of the banana were all white. I covered all of them with an 1/8″ rolled out fondant.

And then colored some white fondant green and yellow.  The yellow I cut into strips and made the banana peels. With the green I covered the #2 & made eyeballs.

I attached all the fondant with just a paintbrush and water. The banana peels were rolled back and I brushed some water on the back side, so they wouldn’t move around.

I placed the banana on top of the left hand and made sure the top was supported by a bit of the ear. Then I placed the #2 onto the the top of the right hand and supported the top of it with the right ear. To add additional support, I put a ball of rice krispy under it.

And I’m spent.

The final product was a hit. They loved the look and taste. It was a win/win.

Plus my nephew sat beside me when I was finishing up the fondant and kept saying “Colin monkey cake” and “I touch”.  When I told him he couldn’t touch until tomorrow, he started telling me “no, no, Ishey” because I was touching it & then started laughing at me.  I guess I wasn’t suppose to touch it either. I’d like to know how to work that trick.

It took a great deal of time, but it was worth it.

Final Monkey Fondant Cake

I was looking for a new way to serve pork tenderloin for a small Easter dinner for my boyfriend and I.  I think I found it.  This recipe from Epicurious.com created a beautiful and scrumptious dinner, and incredible leftovers.

The only change I made to the recipe, was to take some of the pear nectar and cook it down with a little chicken broth, then let the pears simmer in that for a little while & serve it all together.  Be careful not to burn the nectar. I wanted a bit more pear flavor.  Plus of course, I seasoned the hell out of it.  It definitely needed some good ole salt and pepper.  Enjoy!

A baby shower invitation I recently did for a family friend. She had a blanket set picked out with little brown patchwork elephants on the pink and white bedding, so I used that inspiration to design a baby shower invitation. They also wanted something that could be printed out on a standard printer, so I used a standard A7 size and simply added some little pink rhinestone eyes on the baby elephant on the inside and outside of the card to add a little bit of ‘bling’.